Unspoken Words

As I take my pen in my right hand and use my left hand to hold this paper to write, my mind races. It races as fast as my heart begins to flutter at the sight of you. My mind is infested with thoughts and they linger throughout every second, miunte and hour of each day. These are not the twisted visualizations of us sexing each other, which can be pleasurable at times, however, there has to be something deeper. So deep that the souls which live within us dance to the beat of our hearts. Im thinking of you and I, us, we K-I-S-S-I-N-G. First comes that insane, intense love. Then the blessing of marriage. Next a couple of seeds resembling you and I meshed, resting in a baby carriage. I pray for something stable and consistent. My life does not cater to the short lived relationship of boyfriend/girlfriend because although a friendship is developing within that development, the words "boy" and "girl" are no longer apart of me nor what I want. All grown up now and packing away those childish characteristics. I search for character. No interest in stupidity, like that of a male with a hard-on where all the blood from his brain and feet runs to his other head causing him to not be able to think nor run from the situation he is placing himself in (Love Jones). I desire, ponder and often wonder who, what, where and when, but not why since I do know it's a true miracle of God. A miracle to be loved, admired, sought out by someone made expecially for me. And even though my past has influenced the broken fragments of my spirit today, a blessing still stands. Within me lies a minute vessel of hope that your love for me will be manifested in all purity.